There aren't many rules to Meat Club, but they're pretty damn important.
You’ll make Bratwurst from scratch, and while you’re grilling it up for friends at your weekend BBQ, you’ll tell them how the meat was made, including every ingredient you used to make it taste so good. You’ll rattle off a few phallic meat club one-liners and sign up a few new recruits for next month’s gathering. People need to know about Meat Club.
Making great sausage, and cured and smoked meat starts with buying from butchers that source from farmers who raise happy animals. The meat you make will taste amazing because you gave a shit about where it came from, and started with awesome ingredients. Before you know it, your meat club may be taking a field trip to a farm to get personal with a pig.
This is not your 9th grade biology class. Not only will you be a hero for bringing home the Bacon you actually made, you will learn an important survival skill with your fellow men. Divide up tasks, so that each person mans a station where they will chop meat, grind meat, measure out spices or prep the sausage stuffer. Quit whining, grab a hunk of pork belly, and hack away.
If this missus walks into the kitchen in the morning, and she finds ground meat caked onto the floor, it’s the end of meat club at your house. You gotta have your host’s back and help clean up. Once everything is sanitized and sparkly, then you can toast to thy meat with that rye you’ve been eyeing all night.
Seriously. Look it up: Trichinosis. Salmonellosis. E-Coli. Norovirus. Hepatitis A. These are serious diseases that will fuck you up if you handle the meat improperly. Everything you need to know is in the Health and Sanitation section of this book. Consider that section your meat bible. Memorize it. Consider it sent from god.
Also, you’re going to be using sharp objects like knives, meat grinder blades and maybe a meat slicer. Have fun, but be careful. You don’t want to earn a Darwin award in the name of Meat Club.